Simply egotistical

I don't know how to start this.

I don't even know what this post is about to be honest, I'm just letting my thoughts flow into words, words that might not necessarily be English, but nevertheless, words.

I'm not very good at anything.
I'm not even special.
There's nothing wrong with me.
And that's just how it is.

I try to touch everyone's mind, make them feel better, I'm not special. I'm not sick. I'm just me.
Just another, unextraordinary human being that will soon be forgotten as soon as I've passed on.
I have dark thoughts. About death, about dying, about what would happen if my feet had never touched the soil.
And still, these thoughts haunt me daily, I make it sound so dramatic, I make it sound so much worse than it actually is.

You know when you go to the doctors? And they ask you to rate the pain on a level of 1 to 10? And no matter however the pain, it always seems to be a 10? I find that's because your 10 is never defined. There's always things that make the 10 worse, always pains that are so much worse.

I find myself sitting in front of a computer screen most of my hours. Hours that I could be spending living my life, doing assignments, working, pushing forward to my future. I don't want to move. I'm a strong believer in people will only accept help if they want to be helped. If they want to be helped, you can help them, if not, there's no hope.

I'm very much like this. Only, I want to be helped. I want to escape this hole that comes and goes. I want to be special. I want to be good at something and no matter how much people tell me I'm good at something or I'm special, I'll never believe it. I haven't been lied to very much my whole life, nothing is special about my life, nothing stands out. I like to believe that I have had dealt with a normal amount of pain, a normal amount of happiness, joy, boredom and suffering.

I'm a normal girl.

Behind a keyboard.

Just letters.

And if you're lucky enough- a voice.

I'm nothing special, I can't do things, and when I apparently can, there's always someone better than me.

Now, I know, there's always going to be someone better than me.
There's always has to be.

But I can't help it, rocking in as average every time eventually stretches you, you can't be nice all the time, but sometimes you can't help but just need a really, really long hug.

Nobody is there to give me a hug, they're all on the other side of the bloody world. I hate living in Australia. I hate it. It's so isolated. Mainly the reason why I want to live in Germany. It's not isolated, it speaks a different language and it's different, it's something that is so exciting for me. My German is the only thing that really keeps me going but sometimes I even knock myself down for that.

I was sitting in German class, listening to the speeches and listening to the average marks people were getting, I was fairly happy with my 15 out of 18, I thought it was good, but when people who didn't seem to be putting in as much effort as I did got higher, it does eventually get to you.

It's not just the German that pushes me into this hole. It's the loneliness I have too. I make up stories (and this is probably going to be sad and really pathetic but I'm not here to be judged so I don't want to see anyone taking the time out of their day to post an asshole-ish comment down below.) about having boyfriends, to my mum, so my mum stops worrying about my isolation I put myself in. Nobody has really been interested in me to be honest, and the one person that I felt close to and that I was getting somewhere with, ended up paying people to show interest in me so I would stop showing an interest in him. I had known him for seven years. I used to play hockey with him. He was a good friend... or so I thought.

Then we have the situation with Helena and I get so embarrassed and flustered about it, I think about posting things on my blog about her but I know my Frau reads this. I know my Frau, I see her three times a week, for an hour, sometimes more.  But fuck it.

The disease everyone calls 'Teenager' is a period of years between the ages of 13-19. The disease normally lasts for 7 years. Here, everything is either fake, made up or constantly changing. Adults who have been though this disease soon forget it. They say they remember it but I don't truly remember that they knew just exactly how they felt. Take me for example- In a few years, I won't remember this day, not at all, it'll just be another smudge in the daily life I live right now. 'Teenager' is a difficult disease because everyone treats you like a child and expects you to act like an adult. Hormones are racing and everything is changing. Everything is buzzing and everything seems to be different. You thought you got life figured out when you were 12? Well, here's to life being completely rewritten and the worst part, you can't even stop it. It's a thing that just.. happens.

The thing about me is, the depression builds up. I have bipolar depression. I have a massive fucking ego as well. I'm an egotistical piece of Australian shit who complains about not being able to do things.  If I look, I probably have a range of support here in Australia, I probably have a lot more than I realize, but I'm a stupid piece of human flesh and I need the support net to be thrusted into my face otherwise I'll assume that it's not there.

The thing with me is, I want to be helped.
But all the help that I have been given, never works.
And once it doesn't work...

People stop trying.



I'll probably be happy again in a few days and end up deleting this so I'm going to try and fight my urges, keep it up, and all this stuff.

Dôme, Frau and the birthday fright.

Yup, unfortunately it was my birthday yesterday and I'm posting so you'll have three posts this week, happy, happy, happy.

So, we will skip the actual school day because that was boring, just add the part of me not wanting to go to school because it was my birthday.

Yesterday I had been given instructions to head down to my mum's school so I had to walk down to her school, we headed to the driver's licencing center where we sat and waited so we could get some information on my learner's permit, so I'm going to get my learner's permit on Thursday and legally be able to drive.



Then mum took me to Dôme, mum ordered an iced mocha for my birthday,  we sat down at a table and I did some of my German on duolingo. Then I saw Frau! I was quite surprised and I called out for her on instant reaction. She looked a little confused at first because she didn't know where the voice was coming from but then she turned to see me.

She then proceed to tell my mum I was an enthusiastic student before she said that, I actually got really worried for some reason, like, I don't know, she was going to say I'm not good enough in the class or I try too hard or I do something wrong in that class or anything at all and so I almost had a heart-attack when Frau started to talk about me as a student.

But she only had nice things to say which flooded me over with relief and I just let out a big sigh.
Like, I don't know if I do things wrong but then again I'm really concerned with my German and my German class because I don't want to fail. Failure in German means tears and a lot of them. Mum took me to Coles where we grabbed a few extra things then we picked up my brother from his music lesson and then we headed home.

 I took the shopping out of the back of the car and mum unlocked the door for me, I pushed the door open to see the lights turned off, I flick the lights on and my ears was flooded with screaming, people banging on drums and people jumping up, I screamed, back up into my mum and almost doubled over in tears.



I cried for a few minutes, as I cried people came and gave me hugs and pats on the back. Everyone was laughing, I wasn't. I was too busy crying.

Okay, lets explain why I cried and reacted the way I did.

Lately I've had the proper nerve to watch horror things, play horror games, really into that sort of thing. So as a result of that, I have been a bit more jumpy than I normally would have, so this sort of real life shock absolutely sent me over the edge.

It was a very fun party, I had to do my ice-bucket challenge but it was fun and I did enjoy myself. Katie, Tylah, Maryanne, Jerico, Brett, Josh, Shania, Nick, Sharron, Samara and Chloe were there and I enjoyed myself quite a bit.

I skyped Anne, (remember the German friend I talked about a few posts back? Mhmm, she's back again.) and she sung me happy birthday in German and we talked for two hours. Her mum came home while we were skyping and Anne told me her mum didn't speak English so I introduced myself to her in German but the thing was, is I got really really really fucking nervous and made several mistakes and swore then apologized over and over again. Then I nearly cried. I can't just cry and keep apologizing when I get things wrong in Germany. But overall, that was the good final cherry on top at the end of my birthday.



Today, I didn't go to school, I woke up about 3am and puked everything I had eaten last night, which wasn't good because I sat there for about ten minutes while my body decided to empty my stomach, the thing is, I hadn't even eaten that much the night before. So I woke up today with the smell of vomit in my room because I passed out almost straight after I puked. Well done me.


ItWasntTHATBadButStillPrettyBad

But I'm okay now, mum tried to get me to go to school but I didn't want to because I can feel the 'I'm about to be sick' feeling in my stomach still and that sucks. I have tried to eat and drink a few things today but it has only just made me feel more sick and I also cleaned up the vomit in my room, which means I will sleep with a bucket next to my bed just in case my stomach decides it doesn't like the feeling of food in it.



Which kinda sucks because I kinda really love food.


Anyway, my Wednesday has been uneventful and I don't feel any older so.
I'm signing out and forcing myself to go to school tomorrow because I
1) Have cooking
2) Have German

And I'm pretty sure those are very good reasons to go to school.

Actually an accurate representation of our German class. 

Insert Your Own Title!

I will warn you now, my day dragged quite a lot on the first two sessions but I said I would post on Mondays so here I am!



AndIAlsoKnowFrauWillBeLookingAtThisPostSoShoutOutToFrau

So, Friday night, Nick was over and so I had to clean up my room so he could snag the bed. We headed to bed after playing Minecraft and cooking dinner, I went to bed, Nick said he didn't sleep so I don't know if he actually did or not.

But he woke me up at 9am, on a Saturday morning, after I had fallen asleep at about 2:30am. That fucker. He jumped onto me, sat on my waist, pinned my arms above my head and used his weight to bounce me up and down until I woke up. The whole situation was very sexual and... weird. The first thing I woke up to that morning was that.

So I wanted to get him back. I filled a bucket with ice and then with water, adding a pinch of salt because it's meant to make the ice colder and I dumped it on that bitch. So I spent most of the rest of the day hiding in my mum's bedroom with a spray bottle full of water, until I finally came out and we played minecraft until he left.

Sunday wasn't exciting, apart from I did artwork last night..



Hella kawaii mother fucker.

I woke up today after falling asleep somewhat at 3am, which isn't good for my body but what can you do.
(Hashtag Teenaged Problems)
Everyone seemed to be in a bad mood so I just rolled out of my bed and into the shower until I woke up and then that's when my brother started punching things and we made a beeline for the car and out of there. Then my brother jumped in the car and we had to go with him, even though I wanted mum to leave him at home.

Prior to school starting, everyone seemed to be bouncing around about my birthday, and what they were going to bring me tomorrow. Everyone seems more excited for it, even more than I am but I suppose I'm just seeing it as another day, not to mention that I keep forgetting that my birthday is tomorrow. Whoops.

We started in maths today and I groaned when I saw the teacher didn't take more time off. Then I saw on the board that we have a test tomorrow. I rolled my eyes and Maryanne started to complain that it was my birthday so I couldn't do a maths test. But???

Then we had English and I didn't do what we were meant to do, I just went on writing my English assignment but when you think about it, I suppose it's still English work and I can't get in trouble for it. Also, just an add-in here, I think my English teacher is on drugs.




Lunch, everyone was jumping on everyone and I swear one of them broke a bone or something, just that wrist didn't look right mate.

Science, as usual, this class is just me sitting around with finished work ready for everyone else to finish their work. Why my Science teacher won't just move me up is beyond me. Like, heck, I got 20/20 on an assignment that only took me 4 hours. Like, why can't he just move me up? I know I'm smart enough because I was in accelerated science last year. Ugh, it annoys me but I have to deal with it I suppose. But we may be dissecting an eye on Friday if any of the eyes are left, I've already done the eye but I wouldn't mind doing it again because I like to dissect things.

Then we had cooking, we cooked sweet and sour meatballs which tasted yum as but the thing was, I was cooking in a three and I don't like cooking in a three, there's barely enough to do between two people, so I match-sticked the carrot and made the sweet and sour sauce and sat back and let the other two girls cook, it's all chill.

Then we have German.
Another shout out to Frau.

We did speech prep and the actual speech today. So Frau corrected my grammar and everything was cool but I forgot the pictures so I drew the pictures and they were literally so kawaii. After the picture (I'm only putting one because it's rather large and I can't be bothered to shrink the pictures) you'll find my speech and if I have any German followers you can pick on me but Frau checked my grammar and everything so it's awesome.


(I'm a beautiful artist as you can tell.)

"In meine Ferien, hatte ich einen Austauschschüler zu besuch. Wir sind aufs Lands gefahren. Wir sind wandern gegangen. Dann sind wir nach Kalbari gefahren mit meiner Familie und Eva.
Wir sind fast von einer Klippe gefallen. Ich bin nach meinen Oma's zuhaus gefahren. Wir sind mit einem Pferd geritten.
Ich bin nach Perth gefahren. In unser Freizeit haben wir geschalfen, Fußball und Hockey gespielt.
Es hat spaß gemacht."

Ughh, so lets skip to the current time because I just ate dinner and I'm stuffed like a stuff chicken and I just...



Remind me never to eat dinner before completing a blog post.

The elders are over for dinner so I couldn't eat at the computer like I would normally do and type so I had to sit up at the table like a good lil teenager.

All in all, the last day of being 15 has come to a close and well... just meh. I'm meant to be really excited for my birthday but yeah, I'm just lazy.



 I'll probably look back on this day and just go: "God dammit Willow, why weren't you more active with your social life?""



So now I'm going to waddle into my bed and wrap myself into blankets and try to sleep through my alarm and not get up tomorrow but if I know my family, I'll be woken up with a whole heap of bodies on top of my body and awoken with presents. It's only once a year so, yeah, why not.



Yeah, we both know I won't be able to sleep through that, despite how good I am in bed.

~All Dirty Thoughts You Are Having Right Now I Have Already Thought Of Them~


Anyway, I need to stop filling up a post with gifs and just go.

See you later readers!
(And Frau)

Little Miss Complaint

Yes, I'm complaining about someone who complains.

No, I'm not complaining about myself. I do that daily by myself anyway.

So lets begin.



So, I'm going to try and make this post double as long so I can see if I can capture everything that has gone on with my life the past two days, and I've also decided, I will be posting on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, if I post something on the weekend its probably important or I really enjoyed that day.

The reason for that is, life is dragging again, there's nothing exciting in the near future that makes me want to write up a boring report like "Oh, I was sitting in maths class and the maths teacher yelled at me." because I don't know about you, but I find that boring to type AND read, and since this blog is for my future memories and to help me keep track of my thoughts, I need to make it reflect my life as much as I can but not make it boring to read. I don't want same old, same old.

So, Thursday, shall we?

The timetable for today was Cooking, German, Social Studies, Maths and then English.
It's not one of my worst days but with all the good subjects first, it can drag quite a bit.

In Cooking we made Honey Soy Chicken.

REWIND

Long time no see! So, what happened here was, I was in accounting but I found it extremely boring and I need my electives to be fun and something I'm actually going to use in later life, cooking it was. Drama was only two terms so I had to change subjects, so a little reshuffling of my subjects and damn, look I'm in cooking. Which I don't mind at all because we get food, YAHOOO.

ANYWAY BACK TO THE STORY.

Yeah, we made honey soy chicken and I've actually come to love Cooking classes, it puts me cooking under a time limit which I love. I hadn't cooked under a time limit before cooking classes so I assumed that it was hard but it really isn't. I have good time managing skills so, as I stated in one of my older posts, I can quickly fly through what I need to do, clean up, eat and head towards my next class. Cooking class has also sort of given me an extra boost of confidence.

When I was little, I wanted to go on Junior MasterChef Australia, I have, literally always loved cooking and I wouldn't mind being a chef, however when I applied for Junior MasterChef, I was knocked back and my love for cooking ceased. I didn't cook for my family as much as I used to, I just kind of turned over and accepted the fact that my dreams of being a chef weren't going to come true, so I moved on, as people do.

I remember the day that my mum told me that I hadn't been successful for Junior MasterChef, she pulled into a KFC, we went through the drive through and were parked, I had a small box of chips that I was nomming on happily. Like my mum had planned it all, she looked at me and told me that she had good news and bad news, she asked me what I wanted to hear first and I said the bad news because I like to hear the bad things first then have the good things cheer me up last. So she told me that I hadn't gotten in, and I've forgotten what the good thing was. But I was very upset, I mean look at me, about five years later, I still remember it.



It did make me really upset because yeah. So every time the Junior MasterChef was on TV, I would always walk away and just kind of sulk in my room.

Anyway, then we had German.

And German is always one of my favourite times of the school day because I always get to be happy in this class. There's no judgmental assholes and it's the one place where I feel like I belong and I'm accept and I can be myself.



We did three things, we did some sign worksheets that weren't too hard, we had to match up the past participle up to the signs, you must, you should, you can, you may, etc, etc.

Then came the speech prep work.



Not that I don't mind speeches, not that I mind prep work but Little Miss Complaint that sat next to me didn't stop fucking complaining.

So what happened was, we had to write a speech about what we did on the holidays, the stereotypical write up for an English class. A girl who I had already started to hate sat next to me and I didn't want her to but I didn't say anything. Revert, the language assistant helped us with some things on the speech and I could see that Revert was feeling sorry for me.

She sat next to me, constantly talking "Oh, I don't know what I did on my holidays. I forgot! I sat in the car being sick all holidays. How do you get pictures from your phone to your computer? Oh that's too hard. Oh I don't have pictures. I can't do this. I can't do that." Fuck yourself up the ass, I'm done with you.

What makes it worse is, she told me that she was doing German next year! UGH. I practically died inside. She's literally the most annoying person I have ever met. And she's going on exchange with me to Germany, I can't believe it, so I'm going to try and distance myself from her while I'm over there and try to outdo her in German so she just gives up trying to talk to me. And I know that sounds nasty but trust me, if you knew this girl, you'd do the same thing.

We swapped and did another worksheet that she complained about as well, eventually I just gave up and tuned her out, as well as tuning out the rest of the group that I was sitting with. I asked for the answers and I was  surprised  to find out that I had most of them right, but with me coming back into the group, meant that I had to listen to the complaints that LMC was still going on about.

Long story short, I walked out from German class upset and angry. Which is a first, so as I was coming down the stairs, Frau spoke to me and told me some things that I don't think I should put up on my blog but the things were about next year and subjects and German.

As we walked, I told her that German had opened up so many opportunities for me, I didn't know about a lot of things that German as a language could open up for me, didn't know about the language bonus, didn't know about the usefulness of German,  didn't know a lot of things. She left me with a support 'net' as I would call it, saying that she was always there to help and I don't understand why but it felt like I was going to cry, nobody had really made it clear in the real world that they were there to help me so this really meant a heap to me. Add it to the list of reasons why Frau is awesome.



In Social Studies we didn't do much, we're learning about Politics and Law, which I really enjoy but the teacher gets most of the information wrong so nine times out of ten it's just me correcting the teacher. Just like I corrected the teacher about the Berlin Wall and Germany.



Man, I love being a nerd. 

On the way to Maths, I met up with a girl from my Maths class, Hayley and she's pretty cool. We talked about which relief teacher we were going to have, but our hopes crumbled to dust when we saw our actual teacher there. We just kind of both mentally screamed, we were sure that he was dead. He had been away for about three weeks, so I sort of assumed he was dead or on long service leave.

Lunch, oh boy. Lets catch you up, lately, my crush has been a lot more touchy feely with me, slinging his arm across my shoulders, giving me more hugs, all this stuff. Apparently every time he does anything like that, I burn up like Kol.





Helena is gunna kill me.


So we had English and that was boring. Apart from the teacher. Her eyebrows were a fail, they were quite literally uneven. One was up high, one was down low, the other was too slow. (Hah, see what I did there?)

We had hockey photos after school, and I arrived late so I had to try and kit up as fast as I could. Putting on a 7-10kg goalie kit on under 5 minutes is not easy!!

But we had our photos and we trained, then my and my family went out for dinner. There, I saw a girl I knew with her kid.

So I kind of..

But yeah, now I'm off to clean because Nick is coming over tonight. We have a pupil free days today! Yahooo!



Willow, signing out for the weekend.

Back with longer blog posts!

After about two months I'm finally back!

I think I can start making regular blog posts now!



So be happy and excited because I'm coming back. It's been a busy two months. But you can smack me later because I should've been posting after Saki and Eva had gone to bed but yeah, I suppose with everything going on my life has been very busy. I was wandering around the house when I was on the computer last night because I am in the habit of getting off the computer every ten to fifteen minutes to see if the exchange students were alright but now I have to break that habit and just stay on the computer or try to entertain myself.
To be honest, all I want to do right now is just sort of...




Yep, blame me for being lazy and not writing but I wanted to use that gif because it's adorable.

Anyway, lets catch you up.

Is there anything interesting that has been going on? No, not really apart from I got 100% on a Science assignment I worked really hard on and I'm really proud of it so I was bragging a lot today and last night.

Now something I've learnt with the exchange students over here was, we have different school times that you do, so lets explain the Australian school system in a little more detail and you can call us Australians even more weird even though I think the world think we're the most weird country in the fucking word.
Hashtag Australian Problems

So, we start the day off at 8:32am on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday.
"But Willow, that's only four days, you only get four days of school?"
Man, I wish. I'll explain it a little later.

We start the day off at 8:32am, as I already said, then we have a second bell at 8:40am, by this point we're already in class, whatever it may be, Maths, English, Cooking, Science. You need to be in class in that point of time otherwise you get a deTENTION. Classes first period run for 62 minutes, which always seem to drag.

We then have about two to three minutes to get to our next class by the bell, which sounds at 9:42am. Then the next class starts, English, Maths, German, Cooking. Whatever class, you need to be in it, normally the teacher is a little late to open the door sometimes on very rare occasions but yeah. This class runs for 62 minutes just as the first period goes for.

On Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays we have 'Form' which is Home-Room, this is where we get notices, permission slips, extra information about the  school's current events or news. This starts at 10:54am and runs for five minutes to my knowledge. The teachers in Form class aren't as strict and if you're not there on the bell, there's normally no punishment, although this class is still required of us, I normally don't go to Form as there's not much news that I need to know about. On Tuesdays we get a 'Clan Quiz' that goes towards our 'Clans' or 'Home Teams', whatever you want to call it. There are four clans, Gell (Me) Lucich, Dale and Martin.

Lunch is meant to start at 11:00am, giving the students 16 minutes for Lunch, this period is called Lunch One and is the first lunch period that we have.

The warning bell to tell us to start heading to class sounds at 11:16am and the actual session starts at 11:20am, which is quite a while to start heading to class it seems but it just flies by since there's so many students. The third period goes for 62 minutes, normally by this is the last period that teachers actually care about being late or not. Depending on the day I have Science, Social Studies or German.

Period four starts at 12:22pm, here the teachers don't really mind too much about being late like, three or four minutes so here you can duck off into the bathroom if you need to go without having to worry about being told off by your fourth period teachers, by this point everyone is done. Depending on the day I have Cooking, Science or Maths.

There is a 21 minute lunch break that starts at 1:24pm and ends at 1:45pm where the warning bell sounds again. This is Lunch Two and the longer of the two lunches.

Session five, aka Hell. The last stretch until hometime. This period starts at 1:50pm but doesn't really truly start until about 2:00pm, that is when the teacher actually settles down the class, well, normally anyway. Here everyone is just fucking done with school and we're all ready to head home, however, I have to wait through a 62 minute session of German, Cooking,  English or Social Studies. Luckily for me, my two worst days, Monday and Tuesday end with subjects I actually like, German and Cooking so this is normally the highlight of our lesson.

So that's Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays for you.



Oh wow Willow, why blog about school, it's not even interesting what the fuck.
Eh.
The sessions on Wednesdays are less time.
School starts ten minutes later to allow the teachers more time for meetings. There is also no Form on this day and that is where the times are fixed.
Warning: 8:42am
Period One: 8:50am
Period Two: 9:52am
Lunch One: 10:54am
***Resume normal school times***

Apparently you guys have longer lunches which is different, we have time to eat between classes if we please but we almost never do unless we really need it. It's actually sort of shame if you walk around between classes and eat, it's embarrassing and I have no idea why.

Like, if we walk around with teachers, talking to them, everyone assumes that you're a smart kid and actually want to do well at school which isn't a common thing.

We have three levels of schooling.

Primary School. (Kindergarten to year 7)
High School. (Year 8 to Year 12)
University and TAFE (Year 13 to whatever you study, this is optional)

All up our schooling takes about 14-20 years off our lives, yay for school and the best years of our lives!



So that's our school system for you.
Happy Tuesday everyone, I'm off to take out the rubbish and do stuff on twitter.
Talk to me: @AmIASittyThing or bees-unicorns-and-candy.tumblr.com/

Ich habe Angst.

What is happening to my school?

Yesturday we almost had a knife fight and a mobbing... AT SCHOOL, to my knowledge. Year groups have been seperated again and the reins are on us as tight as ever.

Uniforms are checked daily, we have to stand up in class and present ourselves, the school is very narcissistic about it's apperence. People try to give our school a bad name just so the school stops being as stuck up as a private school, Hell high is a public school that I go to, it's a puplic high school, I haven't gone to a private school but my mother wanted me to.

No way.

Okay, so lets actually get into my day today.

So, last night we had a meeting about the Japanese exchange students that I'm meant to be hosting, just fyi for those people who don't know, her name is Saki and the only bonding that I plan to do with her is watching Hetalia with her.

I caught up on Hetalia as soon as I came back from that meeting and I managed to find New Zealand or Kiwi as I call him and I hear his voice for the first time. His accent is really cute but I'm pretty sure that's not a Kiwi accent. CONSIDERING the way he looks, I thought his voice would be a little higher but then again, I pissed myself laughing when I heard Australia's voice for the first time.

I just like what they did with him, okay? And talk to me about OZNZ, I dare you. I won't shut up about it for days.

So, I went to bed after a bit of fun on my Australia account on twitter and before a blink of an eye, I'm awake again, I'd much rather it just being longer to be honest.

I woke up to my mother screaming "Willow, get up please!" 

She seems to think that I will gladly get up if she says please, she comes back several times before I uncurl myself from my cat and reach for my towel.

I got dressed then opened up my iPod, I always check my twitter timeline before I go to school so I know what is happening before everyone goes to bed, normally my twitter timeline is Anne, Jennifer and Helena all late night tweeting, even though it's morning for me. My mum asks on the other side of the door (because I hadn't opened my door since I got out of the shower) if I was nearly ready, repeat the process about ten hundred times and you have me rushing to read my twitter timeline.

I go to school, knowing full well the timetable on today.

Cooking.

German

Lunch

S+E

Maths

Lunch

English

In cooking, we made nachos. Me and my partner, Vivian work well together, she's normally good at chopping and dicing quickly where I can get things going on heat quickly and taste for spices, it's a good thing, while she's chopping I clean, while I'm cooking, she cleans. It's a really good duo and we've been dubbed 'the perfects' of the class because we always leave the place spotless and always end up finishing before everyone else with better quality food.

Anyway, instead of sitting there and eating the food like Vivian was doing, I sat there working on my German cheat sheet as we had an exam the next period... well I did anyway.

So I finish the cheat sheet and walk into German class to find the room had been decorated with balloons....

Scheisse Frau.

Ich habe Angst vor Luftballons.

I asked her what was happening and she said exams shouldn't be unhappy.

...

Frau bitte.

Nicht fur mich.

Danke.

----

We'll skip the rest of the day because it was boring. 

And that's it from me.

Love you or something like that.

NoneOfYouHaveTalkedToMeOnTumblrOrTwitterImALittleUpset

BadTouchTrioBecauseReasons

I'mGoingNowIPromise

Cherry Ripe Swirl: The Highlight.

Sometimes life is bitter, sometimes it's times that make you want to cry but then you have the times that you know it's expected of you to cry, where you want to cry but don't want to cry.
Yup, it's been that sort of day.

So lets rewind and explain the whole situation.
It's been four weeks.

Four whole weeks with a person that I've come to love and adore.

It's gone quick but really slow at the same time, anyway, enough of my procrastination, lets get to the story.

So I woke up today, I saw that Nick and Eva were shuffling and getting out of bed, I whimpered and threw the covers over my head, what seemed like five minutes later, I woke up properly and got myself a drink then I thought, eh, fuck it and got up and watched a few videos of my youtube crew.

Then Eva and Nick came home from my brother's softball game and we went out to see the block, mum showed everyone through the house, Nick, Eva and me are now being referred to as the German trio, so we showed Nick his room, Eva, her's and me, mine.

Then we went to the shops, brought a Germany soccer ball, not German, a Germany soccer ball with the German flag design to the soccer ball, and we played soccer, played on the playground then we went to Maccas to meet and have dinner with Nick's family and say goodbye to Eva because they had moved the time up to 7 instead of 8.

So we had Nick in our car on the car ride to the airport and as we moved closer to the airport I could feel the little lump in my throat that I couldn't swallow, I was getting choked by my own body and I just couldn't swallow the lump... however eventually I was able to take a drink and swallow the lump.

We walked into the airport after I grabbed Eva's bags and wheeled them into the airport, we saw the gang of German students and most were talking in English which was good because that means they learnt something, speak in English or you get smack-smack, especially since the German teachers were there.

So we let them sign in and everything was fine, I was fine, I talked to Grace and Nick and Michael, the three that went to the same school and I had become really good friends with because of the exchange, and eventually they came back.


We take photos before we head up to the security, the very place I've been dreading. This is where me and my family could not go on further, this is where we had to say our goodbyes, and here my littlest brother started crying, we talked a little more up by the gate before our teacher told us we need to say our goodbyes.

I sucked in a breath and went over to Clara, another exchange student I had grown close to then I went back over to Eva to see my littlest sister clinging to Eva's leg and my littlest brother snuggled into my mother's side, I grabbed Eva and sniffled a little, I hugged her tightly and Nick joined in, I mumbled 'auf wiedersehen' which is goodbye for those who don't talk German and let my family say their goodbyes, quickly time passed and almost everyone said goodbye apart from my mother and I didn't know that at the time, I saw the German students were lining up and I rushed Eva, Kareena rushed her as well and yanked her away from my mother before she got to hug Eva goodbye, I only found out when my brother slapped me across the head and hissed at me that my mum didn't get to say goodbye, I apologized over and over again but you could clearly tell that she didn't forgive me.




We spoke to Nick's family and thanked them, they thanked us and told us not to be strangers and I plan to catch up with Nick.. maybe so we rode home in the car and my sister and brother were sniffling and my mum was still giving me dirty looks and I still feel really bad.

So we pulled into McDonalds and got icecream before we went home, and here I am.

So I got a cherryripe icecream which is a type of chocolate, I don't know if you guys have it but it's just cherry and dark chocolate, really nice..

But yup, that was my highlight of the day...



Now I go onto a Berlin wall RP with Jennifer.



The German Trio.
Me, Eva and Nick.

Staring

Willow as Prussia



Eva as Germany



Nick as Austria



And that's Guten Nacht from us.